As most of you may be aware, I took a little break from blogging because a couple of months ago I found myself really ill. At first I thought it was a bug, then a virus and now it seems I’ve actually had a relapse of a condition I had been diagnosed with years earlier. The last few months have been tough and at times discouraging, but I’ve tried my best to stay optimistic and keep a smile on my face; simply because I believe everything that happens in life is for a reason. On top of that a few crazy and unusual things have happened these past few months aswell which I will definately share with you over the next coming weeks; but I feel like not only has it made me rethink my blog and it’s direction but I also feel like I’ve unknowingly been taught some valuable lessons that can only help me to grow and move forward. They are in no particular order but I hope that after reading this you’ll be encouraged
1. EVERY EXPERIENCE GOOD OR BAD IS AN OPPORTUNITY TO MOULD YOUR CHARACTER
Now in this day and age that we live in we hardly ever hear about character or even the importance of character but this is literally the essence of a person. So much focus is given to the way a person looks and how they present themselves publicly, but character is what differentiates from what we would recognise as a ‘good or bad’ person. Sometimes we meet people in life who have gone through tragedies and have come out better and other times we meet people who use everything that has gone wrong in their lives as an excuse to do more wrong. I believe that the moment you start living with the view of accepting that good and bad will always come, that rather than dwelling on these instances, that we would learn from them and allow them to make us better people.
2. IT’S GOOD TO DREAM BIG BUT START SMALL AND GIVE YOURSELF TIME TO GROW
One saying that’s resonated in my heart for a while now is ‘If your dreams do not scare you then they aren’t big enough’; and I have tried to embody that within the blog, the channel and literally everything that I’m doing in life. When I started the blog I had in my mind that I would be the next [put an inspirational person’s name here] and really influence women and young women alike to do better and go higher than just ‘how they look’. I haven’t changed that vision in anyway, as most of the things I have stepped out and done I would never have dreamed of doing them before, but I do think I tried to take on a bit too much at one time. A hurdle such as the illness I’m going through was enough to stop me in my tracks and I didn’t anticipate for that, but if I start small I can learn to manage my bitesize pieces even whilst climbing over obstacles and keep going. In time, the feast will come
3. IF SOMETHING ISN’T WORKING DON’T BE AFRAID TO LET IT GO
Now, this I think may be one of the hardest things for any of us to do because naturally we’re afraid of failure. Nobody wants to admit defeat or go through the feeling of having failed something but again I think perspective is what turns the failure into something you can work with, or better yet just try again. Maybe the timing is off or you just weren’t mentally or physically ready for whatever you embarked on. I think the biggest step towards success in any area is letting go of dead weight so you can invest your time and energies into the areas that are more likely to flourish. For me personally, I don’t think I can run a healthy eating page on my blog at the moment because my other categories are already quite broad and I still have so much I need to learn. So this page will disappear for now but the hope is that the rest of my pages will flourish with more quality content. What is it you’re holding onto that isn’t working right now.
4. NOT EVERYONE THAT SMILES INFRONT OF YOU IS TRULY BEHIND YOU
This is something I feel most people will either agree with straight away or respond with ‘No, I’m sure I know who my friends are’, and to be fair maybe you do. For me, I’ve had too many painful experiences to count and all with people, who in my heart, I probably would have taken a bullet for. The last few weeks I wouldn’t say it’s been anything close to those instances but I’ve had a chance to sit back and see ok, who’s really for me, and the list is so much smaller than I had first imagined. Now this isn’t to say my attitude towards any of those people has or will change. Kind of relating to the first point made – use the experiences you have with people to mould your character. Continue to love and serve them as you would, but just keep your personal cards and aspirations close to your chest because if you can’t trust them with a little chances are you can’t trust them with your lot. Not everybody in your life deserves the same priorities and access as others. As people and their characters are revealed to you, remain the same and keep them in ‘boxes’ that you can manage
5. SET REALISTIC GOALS FOR YOURSELF AND DON’T USE OTHER PEOPLE’S SUCCESS AS MARKERS
This is pretty closely related to the second point I made but slightly different in the sense that it is oh so easy to want to walk a journey that isn’t for you. I’m sure you could apply this in many areas of life but I’ll use myself as an example so you get the gist of what I’m trying to say. I started a blog because I love to write and academically had always been good at English and Literature. I also have things that i’m passionate about, like fashion, hair and beauty and of course my family. So to start a blog was a no brainer for me because whilst I’m at home, I can make good use of my time and my creative talent with the end goal to use the blog as a means to not only create revenue and contribute to my household, but to establish a platform where I can inspire other people to do the same. Now a big mistake for me would be to closely look at and follow other bloggers before me and use their achievements as markers for myself. Meaning if by such and such a time I don’t have this many readers then I’ve failed, or if I don’t have this many followers on instagram and youtube by such and such a time then I’ve failed. The reason I say this is because one, I’m different, and two I can only see the outcome of their success, but I’ll only ever have half the picture when it comes to seeing or knowing exactly how much work it took to get there. The moment I begin comparing myself to those that have in my mind ‘made it’, I’ve already set myself up to fail, because I’ll no longer be doing it because of my goals or passions but just so I can meet their version of success.
Again, whilst I have been away these things have played on my mind. That I’m starting this so late in the game that I need to ‘keep up with the Jones’, but having that mentally will wear me out faster than I can say ‘the PANDORA ROSE’.
This is my journey and I have to live it and learn from it, my way and at my pace. So when, it does work out the way I want it to I can truly encourage others to work at their dreams and not only that but actually enjoy every minute of my own experience.
I really hope this post will help you in some way no matter what your aspirations are. Remember there is only one YOU so just be the best you you can be